Putting things in perspective

I mentioned in my post A Day Out in London about my devastation at finding out that my friend was pregnant. I felt guilty at the time and I feel silly now. Am still grateful she didn’t realise what was going on inside. Nobody deserves to have their friend burst into tears because they’re getting to take such a special step.

What really put this into perspective for me was speaking to another close friend on the phone last night. She had phoned to let me know she couldn’t come to visit as planned, she had had devastating news of her own. Her mum, who I’ve only met a handful of times but was lovely to me each time, is ill. She has cancer. Of the Pancreatic variety. And things don’t look good. My friend was, naturally enough, falling apart. She is heart broken at the prospect that she may lose her mother.

The thought of what my friend has to face over the next weeks and months has made me see how lucky I am. Yes I can’t seem to get pregnant naturally but I have the opportunity of IVF. It may not work, but I have the ability to look into adoption. And if no children of my own come into my life. Mr S and I have a huge extended family. There will be other children to love and enjoy. Not to mention that God willing, my family is healthy. I don’t have to face the loss of someone I love. And if I did I have the wonderful Mr S to help me through it. My friend doesn’t have a Mr S. Her family are fabulous, nearly as close as mine, but they will be equally devastated should anything happen.

Today I can put things into perspective, and hopefully with Mr S to help me, and fabulous family and friends around me I can keep that perspective whatever happens.



via Daily Prompt: Devastation


9 thoughts on “Putting things in perspective

  1. Thats such a good post…..be happy with what you have in your life, not what you do not. It took me 2 years to have my first baby with help. I do understand. It took me only 5 months with no help with my second. The months of heartbreak are terrible but my advice would be look to the future with happiness in your heart as you look at what you do have. We booked a holiday, went swimming every day, cut out alcohol and began to enjoy not taking my temperature and worrying each month. Within three months I was expecting and we never did take that holiday! Take care. I will follow your blog. x

    Liked by 1 person

  2. It is true that some perspective can be helpful, but at the same time it’s not a competition as to whose pain is greatest. You also have your own variety of pain or grief or whatever you want to call it and it doesn’t have to be hidden just because someone else seems to trump you. Yeah, be a great friend and support her through her difficult time, but that doesn’t mean you need to disregard your own feelings.

    Also, I can’t tell you how many people’s pregnancy announcements have DEVASTATED me so I feel you there. It’s not because you’re not happy for them – every baby is a blessing – but it’s just so hard to cope with when someone has the thing you want so badly. It’s okay to feel sad for you and happy for them at the same time. Great friends will understand that.


  3. I liked this post a lot, although I feel horrible for your friend. That’s such hard news. I posted about a little disappointment today (key word: Little. Like very little. Miniscule, really, in the scheme of things) and now feel sort of ashamed of myself.

    Liked by 1 person

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