I mentioned in my post A Day Out in London about my devastation at finding out that my friend was pregnant. I felt guilty at the time and I feel silly now. Am still grateful she didn’t realise what was going on inside. Nobody deserves to have their friend burst into tears because they’re getting to take such a special step.
What really put this into perspective for me was speaking to another close friend on the phone last night. She had phoned to let me know she couldn’t come to visit as planned, she had had devastating news of her own. Her mum, who I’ve only met a handful of times but was lovely to me each time, is ill. She has cancer. Of the Pancreatic variety. And things don’t look good. My friend was, naturally enough, falling apart. She is heart broken at the prospect that she may lose her mother.
The thought of what my friend has to face over the next weeks and months has made me see how lucky I am. Yes I can’t seem to get pregnant naturally but I have the opportunity of IVF. It may not work, but I have the ability to look into adoption. And if no children of my own come into my life. Mr S and I have a huge extended family. There will be other children to love and enjoy. Not to mention that God willing, my family is healthy. I don’t have to face the loss of someone I love. And if I did I have the wonderful Mr S to help me through it. My friend doesn’t have a Mr S. Her family are fabulous, nearly as close as mine, but they will be equally devastated should anything happen.
Today I can put things into perspective, and hopefully with Mr S to help me, and fabulous family and friends around me I can keep that perspective whatever happens.